Hayden Panettiere battles alcohol addiction and depression on a daily basis

After separating from her partner Wladimir Klitschko (46), Hayden Panettiere (32) left him their daughter Kaya (7). Now the actress revealed in People magazine for the first time why she couldn’t take care of her child herself. “I was at the peak of my career and ruined it,” she says. Panettiere suffered from severe depression and was dependent on drugs and alcohol: “I woke up in the morning shaking and could only function if I drank alcohol.”

Throughout the pregnancy, Panettiere had managed to stay dry and clean. But after Kaya was born in 2014, her addiction spiraled out of control as she tried to numb her postpartum depression: “Opiates and alcohol became something I almost couldn’t live without. I had no negative feelings towards my child. But I was deeply depressed. The problem was that I no longer knew where my addiction problems ended and my depression began.” Which is why she made the “heartbreaking” decision to send her child to Klitschko in Ukraine. At that point, the couple had already separated after a nine-year rollercoaster relationship. Panettiere: “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. But I wanted to be a good mother to them – and sometimes that means you have to let go.”