what remains after a year of the divorce of the Gates

This week, Bill Gates reflected before various media outlets on the hard year he has had to go through due to his divorce from Melinda French Gates, his wife of 27 years and mother of his three children: Jennifer, 26; Rory, 22, and Phoebe, 19.

A month ago it was she who broke the silence after the breakup in an interview with the CBS television network, where she spoke for the first time about this difficult experience. What can be established from the two reports is that each suffers differently. She is disappointed in her husband, while he looks remorseful. But they are both sad. “I’m also grieving the same way she is,” Gates said this week.

To add insult to injury, in the midst of their separation, their youngest daughter left for college, leaving Bill in a house (the one in Seattle that boasts more than 6,000 square meters,) “too big” for his taste.

As many will remember, Melinda would have made the decision to end the marital relationship in the face of evidence of her husband’s infidelity, something that he himself admits today. “I have a great responsibility for having caused a lot of pain in my family,” he said in that interview..

Asked directly if he had been unfaithful, the 66-year-old Gates replied: “I certainly made mistakes and I take responsibility.” The infidelities came to light in 2021, when Gates himself accepted that he had an affair with a Microsoft employee for 20 years and that it ended amicably. Before the horns, French Gates said that she “believed in forgiveness” and that she was working on it.

The emotional burdens that remain after a divorce are different for both spouses. And just as in this case everything seems to indicate that Bill feels guilt and remorse for his unfaithful behavior, in Melinda’s case his grief over the separation is associated with frustration and disappointment.

In the interview he gave to the CBS network, he said that he had given “every part of myself” to the marriage with the co-founder of Microsoft. “It just got to a point where it was enough… I realized it just wasn’t healthy,” she said, adding that she “couldn’t trust what we had.”

Although in that statement he points out that it was not only infidelity, but many factors that led to the divorce, his words hint at a certain bitterness. “I was committed to this marriage from the day we got engaged and until the day I got out of it. I didn’t do no wrong so I keep my head up“, said.

Divorce, according to experts, is one of the hardest traumas that human beings go through. However, the paths that each one takes after dissolving the marriage are unsuspected. Some couples cannot speak to their ex-spouses again except as strictly necessary. In other cases they manage to leave everything behind and turn the page, something that allows them to establish a friendship even with their new partners. But Bill and Melinda’s situation ranks more in the first category than in the second, and it is clear that she is the one who is not yet ready for a friendly relationship with her husband.

  Melinda Gates, who is now a billionaire after her divorce, said she will not channel her philanthropic gifts through the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.
Melinda Gates, who is now a billionaire after her divorce, said she will not channel her philanthropic gifts through the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. – Photo:

So Melinda said in the CBS interview when she revealed that she and the Microsoft co-founder are “friends right now,” but not that she’s ready to label her relationship with him as “friendship.” “Friends is a different word for me … that could happen over time, but for me there is still a healing that needs to happen,” she said. He, however, finds himself in a different moment.

In the interview with the newspaper The Sunday TimesHe said that although Melinda had chosen not to use that word, he would. “We are friends. We have a super important, complex and close relationship in which we have chosen to work together. And I’m very happy about that.”he added.

Apparently, it will take her much longer to accept what happened. Keep in mind that Gates’ fame as a womanizer is not limited to the relationship he had with the Microsoft employee. In fact, her name was associated with frequent meetings with financier and sex offender Jeffrey Epstein, a fact that also played a role in the divorce. She stated that “I did not like that he had meetings with Jeffrey Epstein… I made it clear to him.” He added that he met Epstein once, because “I wanted to see who this man was and I regretted it from the moment I walked through the door.” “He was abominable, evil personified. I had nightmares about it afterwards,” said Melinda French Gates.

Both agree, yes, in the sadness that a divorce implies. “Divorce is definitely a very sad thing,” Bill Gates told the show this week. Today. For her part, Melinda said that it was tragic and sad to part, but that she was already moving on. Melinda French Gates revealed that she cried numerous times throughout the process, sometimes as she lay on the floor wondering, “How can I get up? How am I going to move?” This duel is hardly natural and the reasons are well understood by the tycoon.

“We grew up together. When I got married, yes, Microsoft was a big deal. But I was a 38-year-old young man and she was a mature 28-year-old woman, and over the next few years, in terms of what we learned together, what went right, what didn’t go right… that’s more than half of my adult life,” Gates told the newspaper. TheTimes. “We did a lot together. This was something very hard… We had many amazing things in our marriage: the children, the foundation, the enjoyment we had. So it’s a very difficult adjustment. It is a complete change. We were partners, we grew up together, and now that’s different. We are not married,” she added.

Divorces between characters of great fortunes are always contentious. Melinda and Bill dated for 7 years and were married in Lanai, Hawaii in January 1994 without a prenuptial agreement. During the 27 years of marriage Gates became one of the richest men in the world and that could have generated all kinds of fights in the division of the conjugal society. But that wasn’t the case for the Gateses, who spent a lot of time deciding how to split their fortune.

First and foremost, they wanted a fair settlement and so, regardless of the outcome, the couple really cared about not the monetary gains, but rather that the focus be on their philanthropic efforts. According to the Billionaires Index of BloombergPost-divorce Bill Gates is worth $125 billion, while Melinda French’s fortune is worth $11.1 billion.

Bill Gates and Melinda Gates
Melinda Gates wants to fall in love again and have a serious romantic relationship with a man. Bill doesn’t talk about it and just says that he would marry her again without thinking. Photographer: Jasper Juinen/Bloomberg via Getty Images – Photo: Bloomberg via Getty Images

Gates affirmed that finally each one received what he wanted: “We are very lucky people. I feel sorry for when people have super-limited resources, but that’s not our situation. We are going to be able to be reasonably generous with the children, although the vast majority of the money will go to philanthropy.” However, Melinda recently announced that she would no longer funnel most of her wealth through the Gates Foundation, one of the world’s largest philanthropic organizations. “I believe that philanthropy is most effective when it prioritizes flexibility over ideology, and so in my work at the foundation and Pivotal Ventures, which she founded in 2015, I will continue to seek out new partners, ideas, and perspectives,” he wrote.

About the future she is optimistic. She said that she is open to falling in love again and being in a relationship again. “I hope that happens. I’m dipping my toe in that water a little bit,” she said. In him, however, there is a hint of nostalgia that she still wouldn’t allow him to think about her life with another woman, and although she pointed out that she recommends marriage, she says that she isn’t thinking about it. “From my point of view it was a great marriage. I wouldn’t change a thing, you know, I wouldn’t choose to marry someone else… Yes. I’m talking about marrying Melinda again. Bill plans to host more dinners with experts than he wants to know about, and find time to write books like he did the most recent How to prevent the next pandemicwhich was released on Tuesday, May 3.

While noting that “adapting to change is never easy, no matter what it is, Gates made a show of pragmatism by taking his chances. “When children leave home, marriages suffer from a transition. Mine unfortunately went through a transition called divorce.”